I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
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