Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
