Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
