I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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