You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
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