It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
