you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
