I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
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