So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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