It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
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