ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
