Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
