Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
this just has baby written all over it
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
being pregnant is like rehab
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
