My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
ya dads aren't the best wingmen
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Randomize
