i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
