well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
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