We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
