How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Randomize
