She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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