So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
