Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
