I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
