K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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