He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Randomize
