think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
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