you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
