There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
im holly from the hills drunk
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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