it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
