Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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