Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Randomize
