On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
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