Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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