did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
