I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
