I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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