i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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