Dual....:-)
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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