dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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