I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
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