did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
