im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Panties = found
Randomize
