laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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