Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
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