Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize