She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize
