You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
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