i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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