Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Randomize
