Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
