he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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